The Brighton Source Magazine [1st Article] Aug 2001
THE BARE NECESSITIES
Some jobs take real balls. THE SOURCE bared the baby oil and the horny hen posse to ogle up some male strippers and discreetly probe the sweaty world of pert pecs and even perter peckers???.
Male strippers have it hard. Whereas the female variety can feine erotic intent with a bit of boob-jigging bump 'n' grind and a quick drop of kegs, blokes have to shoe some real interest, know what I mean? Women know when fellas are faking it and a good male erotic dancer needs to be well versed in the arts of visual forplay, arousing stage presence and, when it comes down to it, how to use a pole like he means it. While naff strip routines are little more than elongated kissograms to titillate gaggles of drunken hen nighters or lusty gay clubbers who can't dance, a proper erotic show will employ costumes, lights, effects, music and, of course, those little tassly things lads hang from there gonads. Also, as most women punters will tell you, it will be brimming with the biggest aphrodisiac of them all - humour.
'I wouldn't call myself a stripper, but an entertainer who strips,' says Tristan Tristar, whose shows incorporates everything from an all in the buff Ali G and an X rated Austin Powers to fire-breathing and break-dancing. 'people are bored with just watching a guy get naked. Most of the time girls would rather see you with your clothes on.' Really? 'Yes there imagination is a lot more erotic than the reality of a bloke nude on stage. Our manhood's are pretty ugly really. Only us lads think they're great cos they're ours!' Ok, so obviously more to male stripping than a bit of full-monty-style cash in hand, but is he seriously suggesting the audience aren't eyeballing his meet and two veg? 'Well, I don't know. The thing is, women have better peripheral vision than men and there able to look into your eyes and check out you tool at the same time!'
Either way, erotic entertainers know that all the effort spent building up an audience with a mixture of laughs, sexy dancing and Velcro-fastened costumes is blown without a fitting climax. A male stripper is just like any other blokes and takes great effort to be seen in the best light when naked. That can be a problem when you consider, as Tristan puts is, 'going on stage as a stripper has the same effect as going on stage in the lead role in a West End musical. Its bloody nerve-racking and any guy what that does to your manhood - the same thing as taking three grams of speed and going for a dip in Brighton see.' So, how does a stripper provide stimulation? After an initial 'warming up' theoretically, the ladies should remain impressed throughout the act.
The most unpredictable aspect of any show, however, is the audience. 'Hen night can get very raucous. Often the women are drunk and I have to be very firm with them.' Like most strippers Tristan's had some close encounters of the molesting kind, including onetime when he approached woman twice his size and width and instructed her to remove his g-string, at which point she grabbed him, pinned him to the floor and refused to let him go. He nearly suffocated. 'Its typical that it happened the first time my girlfriend ever cane to see me perform.' But strippers have a few retaliatory tricks down their pants, such as pouring baby oil down there chests and flicking if from there knobs 'with practice you can project it 15 feet,' so be warned!
|
